The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Self-Employment
Still newly self-employed, the author reflects on the best advice in the universe not related to knowing where your towel is.
DON’T PANIC!
This blog doesn’t have a cover so this sage advice, from Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, will have to be happy just under the headline. If it’s good enough to grace the best book to not exist in the universe, then it’s good enough to sit atop a simple Substack post.
It’s useful advice. Very useful advice. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mindbogglingly useful it is. I mean, you may think it’s useful advice to stay hydrated, but that’s just peanuts to “don’t panic.”
Because, if you’re becoming or are currently self-employed, the temptation will be to panic at least a little.

The reason for this is simple, going it alone is quite scary. It’s not as frightening as not knowing where your towel is or the bar running out of Pan-Galatic Garlge Blaster ingredients, but scary nonetheless.
After all, it’s just you, with your ideas, drive, experience, faults, flaws, bad habits, and propensity to procrastinate, right?
If it goes wrong or doesn’t go right enough, it’s on you.
Nobody is coming to rescue you.
While I’ve no peer-reviewed study to prove it, I have a hunch that thoughts like those, or exactly those, have gone through the minds of everybody who has decided to go self-employed.
Depending on your disposition, they can be viewed as necessary to keep the budding entrepreneur grounded or as necessary caution against taking excessive risks. Either way, they are unpleasant but seemingly inevitable.
But this is where the best advice is…. DON’T PANIC!
The best advice can be the most difficult to take. It’s easy to advocate for giving yourself the benefit of the doubt or assuming you tried your best, but it’s another thing to internalise it.

So, I’ve developed a guide (in a top ten list, because the internet loves them) to help you not panic while new to this.
I’ve written it using what I’ve learned so far. Alan Grant Communications, my business is new but it’s been in planning for a while and I’ve experienced my fair share of panicky moments. Trust me, I’ve been there.
There will, inevitably, be things I’ve missed that should be in here.
Let me know in the comments or get in touch with your suggestions. Ten is an arbitrary number, the list can and should expand.
Don’t panic if it feels like you’re not getting anywhere, you probably are.
One of the mistakes we all make is thinking that life, or any part of it, fits into a neat narrative. We look for beginnings, middles, and ends but that’s not how it goes. There isn’t a conclusion we’re all working towards like a level in a video game. The process itself is the game and you’re playing it well.
Don’t panic if it seems as if you’re wasting time, you’re not.
A personal trainer once told me, “Doing something small is better than doing nothing.” By this, he meant that going for a walk or a light jog rather than a run or a weights session is better than sacking the whole thing and sitting on the couch clutching the Doritos. So, even if all you’re getting done is some paperwork or a few client emails, it’s better than if you did nothing.
Don’t panic if where you are isn’t where you thought you would be.
Our lives as business people are not movies. You need to be at no point by the time the credits roll. “Should” statements are bad for success and for your well-being, try to use them as little as possible.
Don’t panic if you get unhelpful feedback, they probably don’t know the details.
Most people aren’t as informed about what you’re trying to do as you are. Treat their comments accordingly
Don’t panic if you think you don’t know anyone, you probably do.
This happens to lots of small business people, particularly at the start. You decide what you want to do and then realise you’re entering a market with existing relationships and networks. It feels like you’re not involved. Relax. Simply by being interested in the sector, and especially if you’ve worked in it before, you’ll know people and they can introduce you to others.
Don’t panic if there is a quiet spell, you’ll be wishing for one when you’re busy.
Use these times to do the jobs you wish you had done when you get busy and don’t have time. There are more of them than you think.
Don’t panic if you need to step back and ask for advice.
Nobody is above asking for help. And nobody is beneath offering it.
Don’t panic if you feel alone, I promise you’re not.
For instance: alangrantwrites@gmail.com. Feel free to email me for a chat if this is you.
Don’t panic if you doubt yourself.
There are words for people who never doubt themselves. None of them are flattering.
Don’t panic if you can.
Sometimes panic is unavoidable, don’t beat yourself up about it. It’ll pass. If not, contact your doctor or other health professional. None of this, or anything else, is worth risking your health and well-being over.
Keep these points in mind and I’m sure we’ll see each other at the small business networking event at the end of the universe.